Where Do Our Thoughts Come From? — Exploring the Power of Thoughts through the animated film 《Elio》 / Seeing Counseling Center Lynn Su
- admin_SeeingCounseling
- 7月17日
- 讀畢需時 4 分鐘
Lynn Su Counseling Psychologist
In the animated film Elio, the leading role Elio embarks on an extraordinary journey. He has grief of losing family and struggling to settle into a new environment , Elio decides his best action is to get beamed up by aliens and leave Earth altogether.
His patch to this great escape may seem puzzling, such as drawing alien symbols in the sand and scanning for signals over ham radio. And he repeatedly tells people, “You don’t understand,” without ever explaining what he truly thinks or needs.
Beneath these odd behaviours lies a genuine need for belonging. Unable to find a place for himself in real life, Elio turns to the cosmos in hopes of being understood and accepted somewhere out there.
Thoughts and Feelings Often Shape How We Act
In everyday life, especially when dealing with relationships, expectations, or stress, automatic thoughts often pop into our minds that are uninvited, but are persistent, like:
• You’re not good enough.
• You shouldn’t be so sensitive.
• If he treats you like that, it must mean you’re not worthy of love.
These inner voices are like a looping recording that plays again and again. And they also stir up powerful emotions and influencing how we behave.
Thinking ≠ Truth
Our brains are naturally wired to generate thoughts, many of which are shaped by our past experiences, cultural background, family dynamics, and what we’ve learned over time. Just as we were taught back to babies that apples are red and grass is green, our ways of seeing the world develop from the experiences we’ve had.
When we feel rejected or doubted in relationships, those earlier experiences can easily resurface:
• When a manager questions your work, you might instantly think: “I knew I wasn’t good enough.”
• If a friend starts to drift away, you may wonder: “Have I always been too much for people?”
These thoughts often stem from old emotional memories and don’t necessarily reflect the reality of the present.
“Where Did This Thought Come From?”
When we notice critical or self-doubting thoughts emerging, we can gently ask ourselves:
“Where did this thought come from?”
This simple question helps us pause, create some distance, and explore the origin of the thought rather than being swept along by it. We can respond with curiosity instead of judgement:
• How long have I carried this thought with me?
• What past experiences might it relate to?
• What values or beliefs does it reflect within me?
Elio’s inner voice — “No one wants me” — didn’t appear out of nowhere. It was generated from real feelings of loneliness, loss, and helplessness. If we can create just a bit of distance from such thoughts, we might begin to see more possibilities and make choices that represent who we truly are.
Observing Thoughts, Not Obeying Them
Observing a thought doesn’t mean we have to erase it. Instead, we can learn to say, “I’m having this thought,” and to practise coexisting with it. When we treat ourselves with compassion, we’re more likely to pause and ask ourselves how we truly want to respond.
During his journey, Elio meets Gordon, a peculiar but kind friend from the Planet Hylurg. Through building up a friendship, Elio begins to form new emotional connections and experiences. His understanding of loneliness begins to shift by realising that the sense of belonging might have started from allowing people to understand him rather than searching in the cosmos.
In ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), we talk about psychological flexibility — the ability to be present with our inner experiences while still choosing actions that align with our values. Asking “Where did this thought come from?” is a form of cognitive defusion, helping us move from “This is who I am” to “This is a thought I’m having” — a shift that opens up more room for choice.
This isn’t about suppressing or denying our thoughts, but learning to live along with them. Even in the presence of fear, doubt, or anxiety, we can continue moving in the direction of what truly matters to us.
From “I = My Thought” to “This Is Just One of My Thoughts”
Your mind will say many things. But you don’t have to take every single word as the one and only fact.
You can choose what to believe, what to value, and how to act. Even in a world full of noise and uncertainty, you can return to your inner compass and steer towards what’s meaningful for you.
In Closing: You Are More Than Your Thoughts
Thoughts will come and go.
When we practise taking a step back from critical thoughts, we begin to gain the freedom to choose. Moving from “I’m thinking this” to “I can choose how I respond” marks a vital journey towards self-understanding, personal values, and a deeper meaning in life.
Reference：
Luoma, J.B., Hayes, S. C., & Walser, R. W.（2020）。
Learning ACT（第二版）。（張本聖譯）。張老師文化。
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